Friday, June 28, 2013

Ya might be southern if...

Yay it's Friday!! This week went by much quicker than last.

Enter a GIF displaying how freaking excited I am for it to be Friday.........

Yesterday I was browsing blogs and found this gem. I read a lot of her posts and whatnot, but her latest one made me smile. It had a quiz posted on an online store's site, Bourbon and Boots (don't click if you have an online shopping addiction like me), and I couldn't help but take it. I like to say I'm half southern, but a definite country girl. And considering my results, I guess I'd be invited to sit on the porch :)

From Bourbon and Boots--
We’ve had a lot of border states claiming the South lately, and we’ll admit, Southern-ness is largely a state of mind. So how can you know for sure if you’re a Southerner? Take our completely fabricated Southern citizenship test, and see if you make the cut.

You’re a bona fide Southerner if you answer yes all of the following statements. If you answer “yes” to all but two or three, don’t worry, we’ll still let you on the porch.

1. Buying alcohol on Sunday is a royal pain in the ass. UMMMM yes what the heck is with this phenomenon in the South??? It became habit for me in Memphis to have to make a trip to the liquor store not on Sundays. Here in California, liquor stores are sketchy little shacks run by middle-easterners and a really good place to get shot at. You just buy your liquor/wine/beer all at the same place: The grocery store.
2. I once parked a car in the backyard for a week, and it was nearly overtaken by kudzu. Yep. Try a whole freaking summer. I left my old car Preston (a Honda accord) parked in my dad's lower driveway in Johnson City, Tennessee, for the summer. Good ole dad didn't bother to take it out once the whole time, and when I got in it to pack my stuff, it was infested with CARPENTER ANTS. I mean INFESTED. Thousands. All over. I had to take every box that was already in the trunk (the whole summer) out, shake everything off (not an easy task when you're terrified of bugs), and drive to home depot (with the little fuckers crawling all over the place) to get Raid since my dad was gone and my stepmom was working. THEN the next day I had an 8 hour drive back to Memphis during which I kept a can of raid in my cupholder and killed an ant every half hour or so. It was super fun. I had to bomb the car once I got settled in Memphis.
3. When it comes to real estate, a pecan tree in the yard is a valuable selling point. For sure. I love me some pralines.
4. If everyone is driving very slowly, it must be Sunday. Um or every day?
5. My state has a team in the SEC. Try 2 (when I was in college)
6. Gambling. We all do it, we just don’t talk about it. Check.
7. If you’re over the age of 7, sugar does not belong on grits. Heck no. Put some shrimp, cheese, and spices in those bad boys.
8. At least once in my life, I have been the deserving victim of a “whipping” with a “switch” of my own choosing. True. Even though I grew up in San Diego I still got these. It's not the norm, though, don't worry.
9. That fizzy sweet drink is pronounced “coke.” And so is that one. Yeah. I never conformed on this one. I stuck to saying soda and getting made fun of every single time. Coke is coke. Sprite is sprite. Dr. Pepper is Dr. Pepper. Sorry I'm not sorry!
10. At least one member of my household regularly hunts. Yep.
11. I have ridden in the back of a pickup truck … as a young child. Of course. I also learned how to drive a stick shift in my dad's truck on a mountain road before I had a permit.
12. There’s unsweet tea, and then there’s regular tea. Haha YES! If you ask for Sweet Tea in California the waitress will say "we have regular tea and sweetener?" No, dummy. Not the same thing.
13. I do not live in Oklahoma. Lol correct.
14. I have seen numerous episodes of “Hee Haw.” Actually no. Oops.
15. At least one thing in my home is monogrammed. Uh duh.
16. Banana pudding is a requirement at any potluck dinner. If I wasn't completely revolted by Bananas, sure.
17. St. Louis-style barbecue does not count. No it most certainly does NOT. Memphis BBQ is the only real BBQ.
18. The car in front of me has its blinker on. It probably won’t turn any time soon. Nope. And if a car in front of you is suddenly stopping in the middle of the road (not in the turning lane, even though there is one), they're probably about to turn.
19. There’s a very important difference between cornbread and hush puppies. Was this really ever a question? Hush puppies are one of my favorite foods on the face of the planet. Cornbread's cool and all..but it's definitely not the same thing.
20. I have seen Graceland, and it was good. Ummm like the place? Yes I've been. I lived in Memphis. But this is phrased more like it's a show or something? Hm. But anyway. Graceland was actually cooler than I thought it would be. It is in the HOOD though. Fair warning.

If you live/have lived in the south, definitely take this. It's sure to inspire some silly stories and I'd love to read them!!

So now I'm sitting at my desk, looking through insurance options. Ugggggh. This is how I feel about enrolling in insurance...
It's expensive. I get my birth control without insurance for $9/month (and it would probably be more if I enroll in one of our options). I'm broke as a joke as it is. What are your thoughts on insurance??? I really feel like by the end of the year, when I can enroll again, I'll have been promoted and making more money, so I might just hold off. Or just enroll in dental, since I really need to get my teeth cleaned.

Now for a little rant. We all know I love my job, and most of the people I work with. However. There is a certain someone who works in a different department as me but we still have to communicate often, who was hired the same time as me. We had our orientation together and right away she just rubbed me the wrong way. I won't say her name but it's a name that she insists on people pronouncing a certain way, which to me is just obnoxious. And it's spelled like it always is and I've never heard anyone insist on it being said phonetically. I would liken it to if my name was spelled Nichole, and I insisted on people pronouncing it "nitch-ole". See what I'm sayin'??? IT'S ANNOYING.
Pretty sure that ^^^ is what I looked like when she first introduced herself to me. And then her department's supervisor actually sent an email out to the ENTIRE HOTEL explaining how to properly say her name, y'all! I'm not lying!! I would copy and paste the email if it wouldn't be violating a bunch of HR rules. Anyway. She's also very pretentious and snobby, but fake nice. So I fake nice back to her. But last night she crossed the line. I came into work this morning and there was sticky shit on my keyboard. I thought, wtf? I didn't eat anything sticky yesterday. Then I went to log into MY computer and her name was in the login username box. BUSTED, bitch.

I so wish I could actually do that. Am I right in feeling annoyed/like my personal space was invaded??? But do I say something to my supervisor about it or would that make me look like a brat?? HELP ME.

Alright fools, that's all I got for today. Tonight we're taking Caitlin to Orfila to wine-taste and then they have an outdoor movie, which I'm super excited about. Except the movie they're showing is Almost Famous, and since I have a 4-year-old's attention span I'll probably fall asleep or have to get up and do something else because I know that movie doesn't interest me. Oh well.

I digress.

Have a happy Friday, everyone!!


  1. Forget fridays. Mondays are when you kick ass and take names!

  2. Ew, I would feel violated for sure-- who does that??

    Happy Friday though, have fun at your wine tasting!


    1. I know right?!?! And thank you, happy friday to you too!!!

  3. I have lived in Memphis or the surrounding area my entire life and never went to Graceland. My dad went during Elvis week one year to see all the different Elvis fans. He said it was hilarious. I think I would enjoy doing that now because I LOVE to people watch.

    I would definitely be super pissed about her being on your computer. I mean, why would she be there anyway?? I can't stand pretentious people. Sounds like she needs to get over herself. I'd ask her why she was on it.

    Have a fab weekend!!

    1. Haha yeah the people watching at Graceland was pretty awesome. It was just interesting, I guess, since I never really knew much about him. And the only reason I went the entire time I lived in Memphis was because my mom and aunt were visiting for my college graduation and wanted to sight-see. We did all there was to sightsee in Memphis in one day haha: The Peabody ducks, Graceland, Beale Street, and a Harbor Cruise. I moved a few weeks later hahaha.

      And yeah, I found out from my co-worker she was eating her dinner at my desk. Little bitch.

      Sorry I'm not sorry!! Haha

  4. I died laughing at your post! I moved to the south from the midwest two years ago and let me tell ya it's quite a change :) I still can't get past the slow driving, or the "coke" (seriously don't get how you order a "coke" when you want pepsi, not that I ever see anyone drinking pepsi anyway...), or the fact that you can't go into the grocery store to by liquor. My favorite thing was when I told one of my coworkers I don't have anything monogramed and she literally said "bless your northern heart" and a week later brought me a basket of monogramed things (I didn't know it was possible to monogram so many things haha). I still have never tried sweet tea or grits, but I need to :)

    Also your coworker sounds like fun. I would say something to her and just ask her not to use your computer or if she does not to leave it all sticky. Good luck with her! And sorry for the long comment!